We’re still quarantined and my emotions have been up and down. The transition of me leading my kids’ education was not difficult because early on in their life I implemented learning activities for our home. But even though I technically had all my “tools” every now and then a feeling of worry would come over me and I had to really think of why I was feeling this way.
I realized that feeling was the pressure I put on myself with raising girls, maximized by being the sole person responsible for their education now that they won’t be returning to school to finish off their year. When my oldest was born I journaled in hopes that when she becomes an adult and one day leaves our home, I want her to ….
1. Know God’s love
2. Know her parent’s love
3. Have love for herself
4. Had a good education
5. Know how to manage money
Those 5 things have become my mission with raising my kids. I try not to put high expectations on myself but unknowingly I was using their school as a safety net for wanting them to have a good education. My Aunt once told me that “she was her child’s main teacher and school was an assistant to her education” and because I felt my own education was subpar, I took that advice to heart and was determined to do the same with my children. I prided myself on my kids being ahead of the curve but, this time has humbled me and seeing that their great teachers have taken a lot off my shoulders. I was worried that they would fall behind now that I don’t have standardized testing and teachers input to judge on how I’m doing. I had to acknowledge my worries and pray these burdens to God to have some sense of relief that I’m giving my kids the best I can with the tools I have. This pressure I put on myself might come back or linger but I know it shall pass. My school approach is still and will always be structured as my kids thrive in it, but now I have peace in the outcome of it all.
Here’s a copy of our schedule for ideas that I will be implementing until the end of May and if my kids end up spending the day riding bikes and on their tablets I’m ok with that too. xoxo
